You know you're getting old when your girl friends get knocked up and it's not even a scandal anymore.

jigg and I will be on vacation this weekend, so I’m posting this early.  Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms and Moms-to-be!

My handmade Mother's Day card in less than 2 minutes.

Materials:

• Cardstock of your choice. I used this (cut in half).
• Heart shaped hole puncher. I think I got mine for $1 at Michael’s.
• 6 inch string or ribbon.

Step 1: Fold cardstock paper in half.
Step 2: Punch hole at the bottom center, approximately 1/2 inch from edge of card opening.
Step 3: Bind with string or ribbon.

Shut up about my work.
When people ask me where I work or what I do for a living, I give a generic response.  Most people ask because they’re making small talk but don’t really care—except when they’re looking for a job and hoping that you could hook them up. Otherwise, your achievements are not interesting unless you’ve discovered the cure for cancer or something like that.

I also don’t like telling people I work in finance/work in a financial firm. That’s because there’s a 50-50% chance they will end up asking me where I think the market is headed – which gives them an opening to TELL YOU their opinions, which 99% of the time, is a repeat of what’s already been said in the media.  It’s a set up.

Shut up about my kid.*
When I become a mom, I will make sure I don’t spend more than 10 minutes talking about my kids.  I’m not sure what the acceptable time is for parents to spend talking about this, but being on the receiving end of the conversation I personally start zoning out at around 10-15 minutes.  I get that most parents are extremely proud of their kid’s daily progress, but I honestly don’t care about his pooping routine or favorite character on the Backyardigans.

Every normal, healthy kid learns to talk and potty train at some point in their childhood.  Mozart learned to play the piano when he was three and wrote his first composition at age of five.  What did your kid do today that warranted you talking about him for 60 minutes non-stop?

* Exceptions are when I’m talking with my kids’ grandparents or sharing parenting advice with other moms.

Do you know parents who just won't shut up about their kid(s)? Yeah, I do too.

I feel so strongly about this issue, I made TWO memes on this. Click here to see.

Pee often.
Use the bathroom before you head out and every chance you get during a long trip. You never know when you’d be stuck en-route because of traffic jam, malfunctioning train, or rubbernecking.

I also purposely drink lots of water at work so I have to get up to go to the bathroom often.  This gives me a chance to move around and take short breaks without having to actually remember to do so.

jigg practicing the Leaf Village Secret Finger Jutsu: One Thousand Years of Death

Click here to to watch the jutsu.

Nope, not stereotypical at all.

Because when it’s backed up by data, it’s a fact right?

• Luxury Brands Follow the Money to Asia
• Asian Markets Keeping the Global Luxury Brands Industry Alive
• The biggest opportunity for luxury brands in a generation
• China to become the world’s largest market for luxury goods over the next decade

Breakup Card - We go together like oil and water. Sometimes, a card just says it better than words. Hey...it's better than a text or email right?